She specifically requested a gossipy roommate on her freshman housing application form

     I have a piece of sobering news for pimple-faced adolescent boys inundated with movies (porn), magazines (porn), and television shows (porn) that titillate with images of collegiate girl-on-girl action. Turns out those college girls may actually be *studying* instead of getting it on with each other. Studying something decidedly unsexy like Entomology or 19th Century Victorian Literature. At least, this is according to the New York Times, which recently published the results of a study suggesting that women with bachelor's degrees were actually less likely to have had a same-sex experience than those who did not finish high school.

      I pick up good stories where most people do -- from their hairdressers. My latest story is no exception. My sweet-as-sugar hair stylist at Panyc Salon (blatant plug alert!) recently told me the true story of a quirky elderly couple; we'll call them "Frank" and "Mary" because those are good 'quirky, elderly couple' names. So Frank and Mary were an elderly couple who were married for the better part of 50 years. They had their ups and downs as most married couples do, but on the whole had a happy partnership based on mutual love, commitment, and respect.

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Amy Sohn obviously understands Park Slope.

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It's tough knowing you made someone break his own rules, but some rules are just too stupid to be kept.

  My wife doesn't always like to stay up late and party like I sometimes do, so when she went out of town this week I took advantage of the situation and hung out with some friends at the TriBeCa Grand. I never dreamed the night would end up this way though.

     It's always around this time that my head is the clearest--when the rest of the world is out cold. "3:16 a.m." flashes ominously on my bedside alarm clock, but I pay it no mind and light my spliff. Let me paint a picture for you. A dumptruck on the corner of Mulberry and Houston. A black homeless guy with dreads singing a not entirely off-key rendition of "I Got You Babe" on the steps of Nolita House. The mood is light, the air is playful, and you can feel the approach of Spring. Even the gutter rats seem to be regrouping.

She did seem interested,
from his point of view.

 Maybe she's sick of those artist types.  Sometimes they call the next day, sometimes they do it twice or even three times, but most don't.  He looks like the type who will call.  And call again. And maybe he won't be as boring as he looks.  No, he probably will be, but he'll be someone to write back home about so they know she's not as lonely as they think she is.

The adventures of Chicktellectual Adrian Hotchkiss, as told by applicants to the position she has open in her relationship department. Follow her adventures in the first of our occasional series Opportunity Knocks.

In this episode, Manhattanite John D. Smith attempts to win our heroine's love with a date at a fine restaurant. Will he succeed?