A Granny in Cork, Ireland was busted for coke possession at a bingo game this week—she said she was holding it for a friend guys, so it's cool.
Lol shit we are *reclining* on New York City. I'm posted up like its a futon. Talk about an image of white privilege
A short video clip of a seemingly intoxicated woman preforming oral sex on a man while he asks her, "What's the best fraternity at MSU?" is working its way through the internet social app latrines like Yik Yak and Sneak.
Noted trollblogger Chuck C. Johnson does and says a lot of weird stuff, and, in truth, Gawker Media of late has probably given him too much of the attention he obviously craves. But this one's too strange to pass over: last night on Twitter, Johnson claimed he became pro-life after a med school friend let him watch an abortion procedure.
A man named Shaun blew out his back and couldn't perform his usual sexual duties on account of his injury. Naturally, he obtained a doctor's note to prove it.
A pretty lady appeared on my television screen, talking about "your honey." I was momentarily confused. Was this some sort of new ad for organic honey? Was it about beekeeping?
Björk, queen of quirk, has released a new album called Vulnicura and some real talk about her years in an industry that doesn't favor women outside of a bikini.
Guys.... guys. Arizona State University is home to a class called "U.S. Race Theory and the Problem of Whiteness." The PROBLEM with WHITENESS? You think you have heard it all... but you have not.
"I thought it was the most simple, primal gesture—and you know I love a simply tiny, little gesture that packs the wallop," designer Rick Owens said regarding the three peek-a-boo dicks that flapped down the runway yesterday during his fall 2015 menswear show.
As you may recall, Helen of Troy was super hot. Like, the hottest. She was the daughter of Leda, a human woman, and Zeus, a god who took the form of a swan to impregnate Leda. (???) Later, Helen was *hatched* from a bird's egg. Her face was the one that "launched a thousand ships," which is a metaphor for boners. Or it's a reference to her mountains of suitors and the fleets they brought with them to impress her in Troy. (On her Wikipedia page there is a list naming each of her gentleman callers and how many boats they owned.) Or it may have had something to do with war? If only we could ask the dude who said it. He's dead.
The ugly-hot man is a type that exists in the world. He is the unconventionally attractive man who somehow oozes sex appeal. Jennifer Lopez has dated one or more of them, according to her. Might one of them be Marc Anthony?
The prosecution rested yesterday in the rape trial of Cory Batey and Brandon Vandenburg, two of the four Vanderbilt University football players accused of raping an unconscious woman. The alleged victim testified that when she awoke the next day with no memory of the night, Vandenburg told her "he had to spend all night taking care of me and that it was horrible."
Not even the might of Paula Deen could save our most beloved and confusing of seat back pocket catalogs. SkyMall is flying off into the animatronic lawn gnome-littered Elysian fields of the defunct catalog afterlife.
It'd be wonderful if you could just say to children, "People might look different and come from different places, but we're all equal and should be treated the same" and leave it at that. But if recent news has taught us anything, it's that reality is not so simple, and we need to face the topics of race and racism head on.
This is Zanny Minton Beddoes laughing at all the haters: she just became The Economist's seventeenth editor, as well as its first female editor in the publication's history. In a fascinating press release, she said:
Perhaps you've gotten fatigued by the constant barrage of news about Lea Michele singing "Let It Go" for Glee over the past couple months, but hang in there, buddy: it's about to get good. Michele—who you may remember, if not from Glee, as the girl in your high school theater class who would never stop singing Rent—revealed on Jimmy Kimmel Live! that she totally barfed while singing the song and somewhere out there is a Glee editor with footage of the whole thing.
The Grammy-award winning band Train, a group that has been producing music for over two decades, might be known best for their moving songs about women who are named after states who walk around in unusual but beautiful bodies. But their latest song is causing controversy for encouraging young people to steal from and disrespect their elders.
Deadspin Colts Player: Officials Stopped Using Patriots' Balls In The First Half | Gawker Vanderbilt Woman Didn't Think She'd Been Raped Until She Saw Video Of It | Gizmodo Bulletproof Coffee: Debunking the Hot Buttered Hype | Kotaku People Destroying Cars Like in Street Fighter. Sort of.
— Ernest Moniz (@ErnestMoniz) January 22, 2015
Beyoncé, supporter of marriage, is not cool with these fake Etsy engagement mugs with her almost-name on it. Nice try.